Mar 21, 20234 min read

Communication in Parenting: Lessons From Daily Interactions

written by: Daniel Currie

Season 1 Episode 2 of GuidingTeenagers.com blog post. Rated: Everybody

Introduction

In every family’s tapestry, the threads that hold the fabric together are woven with countless colors of communication. These interactions, whether filled with laughter or tension, shape the essence of our relationships. Today, I revisit a story close to my heart—a simple, everyday conversation with my son, Devan, that beautifully captures the essence of truly connecting with our children as we navigate the journey of communication in parenting.

The Story Unfolds | Communication in Parenting: Transmission Sent

"Hey! Devan!" I called out one sunny afternoon. My voice, a mix of anticipation and the usual parental concern echoed slightly in the hallway. Devan, standing on the cusp of adulthood yet still my little boy in so many ways, was darting in and out of the house as young adults often do.

"Yup, Dad?" His reply came, his voice deeper now, a reminder of the time slipping by. I chuckled softly, the sound mingling with a father's typical exasperation. "Please remember to shake out the pig blankets before tossing them in the wash," I reminded him, picturing the tiny hay pieces that could wreak havoc in our laundry system.

A Caucasian teen boy holding a laundry basket in one hand, while waving with the other

The Assurance | Communication in Parenting: Transmission Recieved

"Yeah, sure, Dad. Got it!" He responded, the quick assurance of a typical teenager echoing down the hall.

The Missed Connection | Communication in Parenting: Transmission Failed

Later, as I went to load the washing machine, a familiar disappointment settled in. The washer drum was littered with hay—the blankets nowhere in sight. Devan, it seemed, had missed the mark on our simple exchange. It was a small mishap, yet it spoke volumes.

Communication in Parenting: Reflection and Understanding

As I cleaned up the remnants of our miscommunication, my thoughts wandered to what had gone unsaid. Had I made my expectations clear? Was I too brief, or perhaps not direct enough? This wasn’t just about forgotten chores; it was about ensuring that my messages resonated with Devan in a way that prompted action and understanding.

Communication in Parenting: A Parent's Needs

It was crucial not just that my son heard what I was saying, but that he truly understood and engaged with it. In our daily exchanges over simple tasks, like the incident with the laundry, I wasn't just instructing him; I was testing our lines of communication and how well I was doing with my communication in parenting. It was vital for me to feel confident that he comprehended my words and was prepared to respond thoughtfully—even in seemingly trivial matters.

Communication in Parenting: A Success

Despite the mishap with the laundry, I hold a deep-seated trust that Devan listens—truly listens—when it matters most. This incident, while not ending as expected, isn't a failure but rather a valuable reminder and a learning opportunity for both of us. In previous situations, Devan has shown his ability to follow through effectively, which reassures me that our foundation of communication is solid. My approach to communication in parenting remains intact. I rest easy knowing that in critical moments, my son will heed my guidance with the respect and attention it deserves.

Older, gray-haired Caucasian father sitting with his light brown-haired son putting his arm around him as they gaze to the left

Communication in Parenting: The Bottom Line

This ongoing dialogue reassures me that Devan feels at ease opening up, sharing, and engaging in meaningful conversations with me. It’s important to highlight that the enjoyment of the topics we discuss isn't our primary goal. Instead, our focus is on maintaining an open channel of communication, ensuring we're both comfortable with just connecting and exchanging thoughts. This approach is the quintessence of effective communication in parenting—it's about making sure that our interactions foster a secure and understanding relationship, even if the subjects themselves are not always agreeable.

Communication in Parenting: A Parent's Lesson

This story, while trivial at first glance, is laden with lessons on the nuances of communicating effectively with our growing children and teens:

Clarity First: Ensure your instructions are not just heard but understood. Sometimes, what seems obvious to us isn't as clear to someone else.
Engage in Feedback: After sharing instructions or expectations, ask for feedback. A simple “What did you understand?” can prevent many misunderstandings.
Consistent, Open Dialogues: Foster an environment where regular, open conversations are the norm, not the exception. This builds trust and makes it easier to navigate more critical discussions when they arise.

Heartfelt Conclusion

Older, gray-haired Caucasian father standing with his arms crossed next to his light brown-haired son crossing his arms next to him

Communication in Parenting—true, effective communication—is the cornerstone of not only parenting but of all relationships. It’s about more than just transmitting information; it’s about ensuring our messages are woven into the understanding of those we love. As parents, we have the wonderful opportunity to do more than just talk to our children. It's essential that we engage with them, listen intently, and make sure they sincerely feel heard and understood. This is what truly defines effective communication in parenting. Let's commit to not just sending messages but to connecting deeply, one conversation at a time.